Huddled in the warmth of a corporate box at Southampton back in 2009, I looked out at the desolate St Mary’s stadium, save for Charlton’s defeated players warming down in sub-zero temperatures after Johnstone’s Paint Trophy defeat.
Carl Ikeme jogs alone, steam rising from perished head. Floodlights shine at nothing. A lone groundsman prods at the mud. A nomadic time of life to grab people’s attention when nobody was really watching.
It’s a funny old game. You spend years trying to get noticed at Tuesday night consignments like these, and the moment you’ve finally cracked it is when you’ve never felt lonelier.
A Homebase car park to be precise, and a call to be told you’ve got cancer.
Most of us know the Carl Ikeme story, but not the one he portrays in his ‘Why Not Me’ book, which anyone with Wolves DNA must take the time to read. I implore you to do so, to appreciate the warrior we never really knew we had.
This quite brilliant book (aided by the written excellence of Paul Berry) is the most joyous, triumphant and occasionally harrowing autobiography you’ll ever come across. And for the sake of Carl’s indefatigable spirit both inside and outside Molineux, it deserves a place at your bedside.
Juxtaposing chapters between football career and cancer treatments, you’re soon left in no doubt how Carl Ikeme victoriously defied the odds in the end, when given just a 30 to 40 per-cent chance of living at the beginning.
‘I was happy with that though, and ready to accept that prognosis. In my head, when I first had that phone call in the car park, I thought I was gone. Finished. So as soon as I was told I had a chance, I knew I had to focus all my energies on what was needed.’
Crass as it may sound, but the odds were similarly stacked against him ever making it at Wolves, when farmed out on loan to eight different clubs and more exotic keepers fancied. He would win that battle handsomely, too.
It became very clear in the book, very early on, that Carl Ikeme is an obdurate, obstinate and downright obsessive son of a gun, prevailing from a modest upbringing when he didn’t ask for much (apart from a pair of Puma Kings) to a place in our folklore when he’ll never want for a thing.
Beating Emi Martinez and company should have been the hard part, but that was being done in the chapters in hospital, when one account of a camera down his throat to determine a life-threatening sepsis complication made me feel genuinely nauseous just reading it. In gallows humour not lost on a goalkeeper, he also lost his sight too, with no guarantee he’d ever get it back.
Like freezing fixtures in round 2 of the JPT, he resolved to ‘ride it out.’
Or the time he swerved his daughter’s birthday party as he recovered from chemotherapy, too protective to tell his little girl what a dose of kids’ germs at the Wacky Warehouse would do to him. Too resilient to flinch as her teardrops fell.
‘I felt so guilty I had ruined her birthday and that was the first time I had cried in a very long time. She was distraught and it broke me.’
Reading this book didn’t just make me proud to have cheered on Carl Ikeme, but proud he was ever a Wolves player in the first place.
He rose through the academy when by his own admission, other keepers had more intuitive flair for the role. Other keepers didn’t clean out a penalty area to claim a corner at an academy game like Carl did early on though, which he cited as the beginning.
‘I was 14 or 15. I was confronted with a crowd of players but smashed through a few opponents, caught the ball and thought ‘yeh, I really enjoyed that!’ Maybe I could do this goalkeeping stuff after all, that this could be it.’
Some might say the ending came too soon…
…Huddled in the warmth of his family home with only Saba, Mila and Maya watching, Carl Ikeme might beg to differ.
Why Not Me (hardback) can be purchased for £18.99 from the Wolves Megastore at Molineux, Waterstones in Victoria Street, Wolverhampton, or online at https://www.amazon.co.uk/Why-Not-Me-Carl-Ikeme/dp/1527250644
Having been given a signed copy for Christmas by my wife, who has read it too, we can agree completely with this review it’s a great read and Carl is a top bloke. Respect.
Lovely post mate and a really fitting tribute to the great man (and his book). I’m sure he’ll be touched by your poetic prose.
It would be great if we could get him down to our 10-year event.
Shamefully, I haven’t read the book yet but will redouble my efforts to do so now. Not sure why I’ve been reluctant. Possibly because I’ve taken in so many articles, interviews, etc with him talking about his experiences, but it sounds like this is a more personal, intimate account of everything he went through.
I read Dave Edwards’ book a few years back, also written with Paul Berry, and it sounds like it follows the same blueprint, contrasting chapters with an overview of his career with one smaller section of time (in Edwards’ case it was Euro 2016 with Wales) which is a great device.
Great review mate. Very fitting words.
Like you say, a must read for Wolves fans. I couldn’t put it down. Proud of Carl and proud to call him one of ours.
Loved Carl as a footballer and love him as a survivor. Ben you’ve inspired me to get hold of his autobiography on Sunday and to read it very soon.
As Wolves fans, we all have a stake in the story of Carl’s battle and so we would be expected to find this autobiography enthralling. But I heard an interview with Carl on a national radio station a little while ago and the interviewer stated plainly that this book and the story it told was one of the most gripping, thoughtful and touching biog’s he had ever read.
I’m not a great bookworm myself but I will certainly be picking up a copy. What an honour to have had such a man playing for our club.
I know that a fair few people who contribute to the blog have experience of either themselves, or a loved one going through similar traumas to those that Carl went through.
My heart goes out to everyone who has suffered, and to those who gave them support and love during the darkest times.
It’s often the immediate family who are the ones who bear the mental brunt of that horrible disease and get little recognition for their strength and sacrifice.
I haven’t read Carl’s book but I’ll make sure it’s on my list to read in the near future.
A top man.
Had a few drinks with carls dad ike in the great western with a few of the lads lovely bloke one of us same as carl .. just purchased the book for my collection what an inspiration.
Offered. Delivery tomorrow.
Didn’t know Carl had a autobiography in print.
Can’t wait to read the great man’s story.
Offered ? Ordered, what the xxxx.
As a goalkeeper and a cancer survivor he was, and is, a warrior. In our recent pre-Fosun darker days, following a defeat at Molineux, didn’t he punch a hole in the tactics board in absolute frustration? That’s how much he felt. He’s dealt with cancer in much the same brave way. Always our Number One.
Brilliant Ben. F*cking brilliant.
I was just thinking how great it would be if the referee in the game tomorrow is European and goes to the pitchside monitor and makes the decision himself.
Show the Premier League how it is supposed to be used.
Tim, wrong post.