Ssshhh, can you hear that?
Just close your eyes for a second, remain still and be completely silent.
You can probably just about make out the faintest din.
Yes. That’s it. You’ve got it.
Do you know what that is?
It’s the shrill, piercing echo of Fulham supporters squealing to passers-by from the towering heights of their soapbox about being roughhoused by gold-shirted yobbos.
Evidently, Wolves are a “disgrace to the Premier League” and must immediately be excluded from playing professional football and extradited to Guantanamo Bay for a medley of cruel and unusual punishments.
Mercifully, the well-informed British media that regularly tune in to observe the final 5 minutes of Match of the Day were on hand to pick up the baton and ensure these violent brutes are reprimanded appropriately.
Christophe Berra is to be hung from the gallows at sunrise for two life-threatening body-checks, Karl Henry beheaded for the repeat offence of cleanly winning possession of the football and Mick McCarthy, hung, drawn and quartered for the pre-meditated slaughter of the noble princes of Craven Cottage.
There was however controversy at the Supreme Court after they charitably spared the life of Michael Mancienne, choosing instead to amputate both of his arms for being the first ever professional footballer to cling to another player’s shirt.
Prime Minister David Cameron held an emergency 36-hour counsel with Hugh Grant, in which it was decided that a global war on ‘physical contact in the game of football’ must be waged in order to halt further atrocities.
Any player convicted of coming within 25 feet of a fellow professional on the field of play with the intention to prod, poke or approach at reckless speed is to be immediately taken down by strategically positioned snipers, hidden within the stands.
Similarly, any footballer deemed to be ‘putting a shift in’ will be dealt with using deadly force and a shoot-to-kill policy.
And lo, it was decreed, that from this day forward, September 11th will forever be associated with the Craven Cottage attacks.
Fulham supporters in mourning are encouraged to gather for a special midnight vigil outside Harrods, where flowers and messages of condolence can be left for the families effected by the trauma.
Prawn sandwiches will also be available for £18.50.
…because sometimes a stupid accusation deserves an equally ridiculous response.
Here here. I’m getting fed up with all this. We don’t have a stereotype for Wolves after last year labelling them as “Relegation Fodder”. That clearly doesn’t make sense, what’s the next lazy stereotype we can use?
Hilarious but statistics, fines and a hospital record kinda suggest you’re in denial.
A serious lack of football knowledge suggests you don’t know what you are talking about!!
If you think we are a dirty team and have ever set out to injure one single player, or deserved to pick up even half of the bookings we’ve now received, then i’m sorry but you are having a laugh mate.
I suggest you start watching netball, tiddlywinks or some other non-contact sport if football is too much for you
Pathetic response. As I said, you’re in denial.
http://www.fifa.com/mm/document/affederation/generic/81/42/36/lawsofthegame_2010_11_e.pdf
Have a read of Law 12
thanks alan for sharing that, have duly read law 12, and lo and behold it says thou shalt not tackle with excessive force. perhaps you should write to the ref, to mick mccarthy and to mark hughes, three football professionals who all think we didn’t tackle with excessive force, and teach them about what constitutes a foul as they don’t seem to share your understanding of the rules. in fact, there aren’t many people outside of craven cottage and the emirates who do. in fact, you should probably write to sepp blatter too, as his rules have clearly been misconstrued and heads should roll.
is there a petition i can sign anywhere?
Will do. Got anything intelligent to say?
ok… Berra was stupid, got in a daft position, twice, and then produced 2 unnecessary fouls. he deserved a red. as did john pantsil when he brought down kevin doyle when through on goal and was very lucky to get away with a yellow. hangelaand (sp?) and murphy both weighed in with dangerous, reckless challenges late on in the game, with what looked like an intent to injure our players.
henry tackled zamora, from slightly behind and to the side, which some refs will give a foul for and this one didn’t. he then took the ball cleanly, as he followed through he unfortunately hit zamora’s standing leg and caused a horrific, but thoroughly accidental injury. would you rather our defensive midfielder didn’t try to protect his back four? well, of course you would, but would you be happy if your own midfielders didn’t put a foot in on our best striker, allowing him a free run at the defence?
other than that, we contested the 50/50’s, challenged for second balls, and tried not to allow you time on the ball to settle and build a rhythm. all very important facets of football, as you would surely concede.
now kindly go write on a fulham blog somewhere and moan with your own kind about how everything above cambridge is the north.
We’ll always see it differently, sleachy, that’s the way of things. But here’s my take for what it’s worth:
Pantsil – it did happen at our end and what I saw was John stood still and Doyle made sure they contacted as he ran past. Pantsil was taken off at half time because of the red mist descending over what happened to Zamora. Very un-Pantsil like.
Hangeland & Murphy deserved carding. No doubt in my mind they wanted to leave their mark on a couple of your men. Inexcusable. I’ve seen Murphy do this before a couple of time but Hangeland never – what could he have been so angry about?
Karl Henry followed through – illegal tackle by definition. He actually trapped Zamora’s leg in a scissors, had hold of his shirt & pulled him down – snap!! I’ve got the still photos taken from video. It’s clear.
You did work hard to hassle us – no problem – but there’s only so much non stop shirt pulling and nudging from behind can be tolerated.
P.S. Where’s Cambridge?
Why the hell would Doyle make sure they contacted when he was through on goal? That’s ridiculous
Ask him, I don’t know. Maybe his mind-set.
P.S. he wasn’t ‘through on goal’
Cheers for the rule book Alan but i’m struggling to see the line which says a free kick should be given when a player wins the ball.
So what if Henry’s momentum takes out the player afterwards, he’s still won the ball. What are you going to do, outlaw sliding tackles. There was no intent or malice in Henry’s challenge, he was fully focused on winning the ball. Your manager and Danny Murphy both said as much afterwards. What happened to Zamora was an unfortunate accident. No football fan wants to see another player stretchered off. I’m not saying this just to defend our player either, my opinion would be the same if it had’ve been the other way. Its part of football, you know a physical contact sport. If you’ve ever played the game you’d know that.
No mate, you’re right, he wasn’t through on goal because he was tripped, otherwise he would’ve been
I think we have to tone it down on the pitch so far we have put a Stoke player out of the game albeit temporarily and now broken a Fulham players leg plus all the bookings and sending off we have had. Do we have to be that hard? I personally don’t like the way we are going about things.
I am concerned that referees will be gunning for us and with professional footballers collapsing at the slightest provocation this could backfire on us.
Remember Dirty Leeds?
Michael,
I hope your team sorts itself out. I would love to see a good Wolves side in the Prem.
you already have. 3 games in 2 years, 4 points each. see you at molineux for the decider.
I wasn’t talking to you.
you’re on our site
True, no need for me to be pissy. Apologies due to you.
We had a Wolves fan on ours. Tracked his thread – he’s been there all day fighting us over this. Steway – do you know him?
Ahh, how quaint! I don’t personally, but having more than 19 fans makes knowing everyone tricky.
Now you’re just showing off, trying to impress people again.
Not interested.
Bye
Don’t let the door hit you on your way out!!!
This is worse than when we played our reserves against Man Utd!!! It’s only two unusual games – that’s all!
We’ve even got away fans on here two weeks after we played them having a moan! You can tell there’s been an international break and nothing going on!
Fulham deserved to beat us, they were the better team on the day. Newcastle were lucky to get a point given the clear penalty after a foul on Jarvis.
Someone crocked our record signing (Fletcher) in the first game against Stoke, Craddock had to go off to repair his head after dealing with that gypo the toon play up front – but we’re not all on here like a load of b*tches moaning about it. That’s just football!
I’ve just looked up the stats from last season and the wreckless serial-bonebraking madman Karl Henry came on a shared 50th spot with six (6) yellow cards.
I certainly don’t want to meet any of the 49 above him in these stats in a dark street in London or Manchester. Mascherano had 10 yellow cards. Watch out if you take a weekend in Barcelona!
that’s a fair point paddy. isn’t that just one more card than those mercenaries murphy, pantsil and everybody’s least favourite caravan dweller greening?
actually, hasn’t that hapless psychopath only received one red card in his whole career as a hard tackling midfielder, and that at the emirates last year, a place where wet cockneys congregate to cry their eyes out every time one of their precious little princes gets dispossessed. hang on, that sounds familiar….
Yet more proof that this is all a load of b*llocks made up to fill newspapers and air time.
I have an idea for the BBC – MOTD could use this time to show more highlights from the games involving Wolves/Albion/Villa (all teams North of Watford Gap that are not Man Ure or Liverpool) rather than having the drone of Hanson slagging off defending for 45% of the show.
Bring back ‘The Premiership’ on ITV and that bloke with the tosh who sh@gs transvestites!
Very funny Thomas, and suitably ridiculous.
Talking of ridiculous, stumbled across a website selling t-shirts adorned with the faces of Adam Proudlock, Michael McIndoe and George Elokobi, amongst many others. Beyond belief:
http://www.cultzeros.co.uk/wolves.asp
love it. that’s christmas sorted for the missus!
Classic – put me down for two Freddie Eastwood’s and a Mark Burke! They do a Bobby Zamora one but the link is broken!
I bet the recession has hit this website hard – that and its total inability to move with the times!
Good job Keith Downing still isn;t in the side ! Or Shane Westley… we would be down to 9 each week….
imagine what they’d make of kevin muscat!
Well well karl henry breaks some1s leg, now how dont that surprise me.Dirty team that kicks anything that moves.Disgrace to the premship,spot on by the fulham supporters.
….and Joey Barton is……???
Before you come on here with your inane pontificating self righteous drivel, I think you will find the vast majority of Fulham fans are accepting that it was a fair tackle , one that we see every few minutes in the PL. How about we make the game non contact? Probably suit your puny stance? Now go away and slag off Mike Ashley ( or are you now tired of that?)
Great isn’t it toon,toon.toon? Shame it wasn’t Barton – oh well there’s always St James. Is the fixture close to Christmas as maybe Henry can stub a cigar out in his eye at a party?
Hope your “massive” support enjoyed the Blackpool game on Saturday – and hope you get served up much more of the same this season.
I’m surprised, with your level of intelligence, that you managed to spell TOON three times in a row without a spelling mistake.You must be one of the few that stayed on at school until you were 14?
I think you are some lowlife WUM that really isn’t a Newcastle fan.
Professor Toon Cubed, were you born on 606?
Some of you might have noticed that I’ve removed one or two comments made by a certain Geordie.
Just to be clear, fans from opposition teams are allowed to comment, but anyone who thinks they can come on here to write nonsensical jibes directed at Wolves supporters can guess again.
Yes, it’s great to see debate between fans, hence why I allow certain comments to slide, but above anything else I want this blog to be a place where Wolves supporters can chat about the issues affecting our club without being bombarded with crap from outsiders.
This isn’t 606.
Well done Thomas – your site is attracting a lot of nob heads at the moment.
Don’t they have their own blogs to go to?
He’s just pissed that we didn’t cave in to them a couple of weeks ago.
Newcastle were the dirtiest team I’ve ever seen that day. Nolan, Barton and Smith were an absolute disgrace but thanks to MOD it’s us thats been tagged with a label rightfully theirs.
They may have kicked and clogged their way to promotion last season but it was only because teams gave way to their loutish (in keeping with their heritage and locality) thuggery.
With no Plan B, they looked doomed to me and good riddance to jail-bird Barton and co.
The day other professionals start to complain – and I haven’t heard any yet – about us, I will start to worry. Hell, they seemed to relish our battling against Newcastle on MOTD.
Poncy Fulham fans who didn’t bother with the club when they were languishing in the bottom division can be ignored.
I’m even starting to warm to Robbie Savage on 606…
You’d think Fulham had never come from the lower leagues the way their fans are going on. Are their memories that short or are we just seeing a load of new fans joining the club now that they are in the premiership.
Off topic, but interesting table-alert. Prior to our game at fulham, a break down of a our premiership points accumulation by team
http://www.sportingintelligence.com/2010/09/10/wolves-at-the-cottage-door-while-mick-mccarthy%E2%80%99s-men-scent-points-at-fulham-this-weekend-100910/
A big congratulations to MOTD for turning one industrial performance against Newcastle into the new ethos of our club.
To be honest I’m suprised so many people saw the Barton tackles montage as they put us on at 11.55pm for two minutes every f*cking week.
F*ck off Lineker.
I just saw the tackle. Absolutely nothing wrong with it, and I’m really upset for Bobby Zamora. It’s a real shame for him, however, if Karl Henry is labeled a dirty payer for that then then something needs re-jigging.
You must be watching the same programme as me mate.Totally agree, great tackle, nothing wrong at all
I’m going to bed now while we are still 1 up 🙂
I cannot believe the WHINGERS saying we have to tone it down on the pitch…are these not the same people who would get straight onto the backs of the players and accuse them of not trying if they didn’t get “stuck in”…of course they are. Football is a physical game so injuries happen, now I ain’t sad enough to take still photos from the video of a tackle but I have seen it enough to say, with some degree of certainty, that there were dozens more just like it all over the country on Saturday all that happened is Zamora fell badly…unfortunate but that’s life
I can’t handle this anymore….
Wolves are actually being talked about in the national press…
I’m really not used to this. Is there a helpline? I really need someone to talk to about it.
We’re dirty…..we’re not dirty….we’re dirty…..we’re not dirty….we’re dirty…..we’re not dirty….
Please stop the voices…
Maybe we could set up a dirty league for the dirtiest Wolves players of the season…..now I’m replying to my own post. Is that like “high fiving” yourself?
Nowhere near as bad. Anyway, you’ve got mitigating voices.
Can you believe it tho Sleach?
We are popular….. we are news….
If this was the Championship, it would be much of nothing.
I can’t see how this arguement has got to where it is. NON OF THE PLAYERS OR MANAGERS MOANED EITHER ABOUT THE TACKLE OR THE NATURE OF THE GAME.
Maybe its a cockney thing – they know more about football than the people playing or managers managing.
Maybe they should go into investment banking and make loads of Ponies and monkeys or indeed politics and run the country.
I personally wont be happy until Henry tries to burn someones eye out with a cigar at a Christmas party!
I see Valencia has broken his leg 2nt. Ban Henry!!!!!
No doubt some posh tw@t from Fulham will manage to blame Henry for Valencia’s injury, wait a minute that Kenny Miller bloke used to play for Wolves and he was playing tonight – so there you go it’s definitely Wolves fault!
Also saw Fergie made 10 changes to his team tonight…………………but lets not go there again!!!
Just looked at Sky News and there’s some breaking news on the yellow scrolling bar: President Mugabi has today labelled Karl Henry as an evil thug whose wrecking spree must be ended now.
Billy Bremner has also made a staggering comeback from the dead to add: “That Henry is a bit of a clogger.”
Chris, I saw that. I’d like a reporter to get down to the Emirates and ask Wenger his comments on how much Ferguson has devalued the Champions League, bearing in mind he said exactly the same thing in the Premier League when we had 10 changes.
Manure have now devalued the meaning of the group games in the Champions League and brought the English game into disrepute. Ferguson has obvioulsy thought the game against the bin-dippers this weekend is far more important than the CL… and don’t even get me started on when they refused entry into the FA cup a few years ago…..